Welcome to Shabnam's World of Color and Beauty
One of the greatest gifts that I ever received and decided to work with, is constantly staying out of my comfort zone, facing my fears and not designing my journey around my insecurities; the secret is to recognize them, to embrace them, and to gain the courage to break free from them. We are the most powerful creators and it is time to show up and own our superpowers.
Throughout my journey, I have had the privilege of being exposed to the works of many great minds and amazing influencers. Their journeys inspired me everyday and gave me the hope to create a better me, a better life, and a better future. If I can change myself to break free from this web of limitations I have managed to weave around all the different aspects of me, so can you.
Since my early childhood, I was questioning almost everything. I had a very hard time following the rules without understanding the underlying rationale. I used to debate the fundamentals of religion with my familial elders and they collectively believed I would end up somewhere not really good, in life. I have been labeled as “provocative”, “rebel”, “stubborn”, “outlaw”, “weird”, “difficult”, "know-it-all" and “always wanting to be different”. Sounds familiar? Then read on ...
While growing up, it was almost impossible to force me to do anything against my desires and I think that is how I earned the title “stubborn”. Back then I had a very strong inner knowing that I understood how to work with. I was closely in touch with my emotions and intuition. I was able to paint and write poems. Until I started to realize that if I want to be successful, there is a certain way to be and the peer pressure kicked in. All of a sudden life was not about what works for my highest good, anymore. It turned into a survival game that I had to be able to make it to the next level, no matter what. It was about which profession generates more money, by which age should one retire, how many cars or houses should one own by the age of forty and etc. The focus was far from my life purpose. In fact, I didn't even know what life purpose meant. As a result, to rise above all the odds that stood in my way, I became a warrior in the making.
At the age of eighteen, I did a quick analysis: Based on the standard definition of success and where I was standing in life, I had to work really hard to win the gold medal in life's competition for success. I decided to study hard, learn a second language, act professional, play by the rules of a left-brained and analytical society and above all, be politically correct and fit in. I was graduated in Statistics and my career kick started in international corporations. On the way to achieve success, I lost my voice and personality as a woman. I became a judgmental, workaholic perfectionist overachiever who was always short of time. I was giving every project, all I had, to impress my leaders at work and oh I was acing it. I got my MBA and worked in 3 countries as an expat. I got to senior management level and in my mind everything was going according to the golden rule of winning. I was travelling the world and I was feeling in control. I was the boss of me and I was loving it until I wasn't. Life has a mysterious way of realigning us with our purpose.
I am sure you have heard miracles happen when we are out of our comfort zone. Why is that? Because, that is the space, we have no control over the outcome, our mind cannot predict the exact result. It is unfamiliar but it is a clean slate where we can create, co-create and manifest magical experiences. We are creating from a space of unknown and therefore we are not replicating our previous experiences and that is where wondrous surprises happen.
In 2015, I moved to Canada and life took its course. Nothing was working anymore based on the rules I was familiar with, not even hard work could resolve my challenges this time. My health diminished. The fighter I had become, I thought I needed to be stronger and fight harder and the more I fought, the more I struggled. It got to a point that I could no longer walk, I was in bed all day in a new city with a new job at the time and I didn't know anyone. I was not able to take care of myself and that's when I stopped trying. I took a step back and spent some time to understand the underlying reasons which brought me to the point I was at. It felt like a dead-end. A web of unresolved emotions that I did not know how to untangle from. Up to that moment, I don't remember enjoying any of my life experiences, as they were happening and unfolding in the present moment. I was either in the past or anticipating some upcoming event in the future which created high stress responses in my body.
But as I stopped trying so hard and as I stopped expecting things to go my way, the struggles faded and help showed up. I met new people who became close friends and I found the right coach! Suddenly I was surrounded by a wonderful community who helped me immensely to move to the next chapter of my life. I started studying epigenetics, psychology, human behavior and the impact of thoughts and perceptions on our physical state of being. I was fascinated with this new world. With the help of my mentors and coach I started making small changes which created huge impacts. It was way out of my comfort zone and anything but easy. They say "it's easier for people to die than to make a change." But I was determined to change my life.
By elevating my state of mind, my emotions changed and my whole life shifted significantly. I wasn't a victim of my genes, emotions or environment anymore. I reclaimed my power and stopped giving it away to every person and event. Unimaginable doors opened. New people walked into my life that I could never dream of. I finally understood the meaning of "It's not the Destination, It's the journey.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson. Now I know how I used to sabotage my success in life by constantly doing rather than just taking a moment to be. As Kurt Vonnegut said beautifully , "I am a human being, not a human doing.” It's surprising how some of these simple ideas and concepts that we have heard about, all our lives, can be making monumental effects on our state of being if understood and internalized. We are powerful creators if we develop the capability to be in the present moment and think positive.
I found purpose and meaning in life. I started walking again and my healing journey started. In 2018 I began coaching with ERIEC which is a career consulting council helping newcomers find employment in Canada. Given my career background and the rough path I had walked on, I was able to help many people like myself finding their purpose and achieving their goals. Today, with more than 500 hours of coaching experience, I empower individuals to align with their life purpose through recognizing their physical, emotional, mental and spiritual powers. I embrace change and help my clients to surf the waves of uncertainty and doubt safely.
Wherever you are, regardless of the challenges you are presented with, stay the course. Try something new everyday. Never loose hope. If I could do it, you too can do it.
What you seek, is seeking you.
What They Say About Shabnam
IT Business Analyst, Canada
"I moved to Canada in 2019 and was facing challenges to create my career path in a new country. I was eager to know more about the Canadian work culture and to create my footprint in the industry. I came across Shabnam's work and her coaching approach to establish a career path in alignment with my purpose. The program was very well structured and I liked it. All the sessions were detailed and different from one another which helped me to grow professionally as well as personally. The encouragement and guidance from Shabnam's personal experiences were relatable and soothing. I was able to find my place in my industry. Working with Shabnam was really nice. and our sessions are still helping me. I am grateful for her undivided attention."
The new master of spy and action novels, Switzerland
"I was at my go-to bakery, feeling a little disappointed browsing through the few pastries still available. I heard the baker asking me:
- Can you find what you want?
- Uh...No! I said.
- You know Sir, you don't always get what you want!
That sentence hit me in the face, I couldn't repress my smile, I remembered all the work I did with my dear coach, Shabnam.
Thanks to her precious advice, my life took a turn for the best and even though I was already known as one of the best spy novelists when I met Shabnam, today I am the Master in the world of Spy Novels, and the success I am experiencing, is extraordinary!
Once again, thanks to Shabnam for her presence, her patience and her ability to lead me on this new life path".
Software Developer, Canada
"When I met Shabnam, I was a newcomer in Canada. I was trying to navigate and see how I could fit in. I was in search of some guidance to build my career path. Shabnam was once a newcomer and a woman in tech sector. She was volunteering her time so that people with similar experiences, could have a smoother and a more joyful process to find their path. She inspired me every session we had and made me believe that it is possible to succeed as a female newcomer in the Canadian IT world. Through working with Shabnam, I gained confidence, hope and inspiration to keep going. Shabnam is kind and one of the most inspiring people I have ever met. I enjoyed every minute of the coaching program, and I could not have asked for more."